Thursday, July 13, 2006

just one of those...

It's one of those days-rain is pouring down and the sky is the color of a grey scale. Any clear, rainbow happpy thoughts seem to be melting into a puddle of brown with the rain. I can't seem to read the things I need to, think the things I need to or do the things I need to. Hope is out of reach today and the energy to pull it down to me is lacking. Relationships seem vaguely out of sinc, and the hole in the family is noticeable. I hate days like today.

I know the routine. Blue skies are behind the clouds and if I just wait a little while, things will change. "The sun'll come out...tomorrow..." Sometimes I really don't want it to. I need the rain-it hides tears, washes away the muck in my heart and brings growth-but not too fast. And I don't want to think about the consequences of it now. I just want to stand in it without an umbrella and feel.


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