opposing forces

I did go to the wake last night. I was praying all the way because I was nervous, I hate these thing, I just couldn't remember Linda's face and I felt so awkward and sad. As soon as I pulled up to the funeral home I recognized her standing outside, pacing back and forth. And thankfully as soon as I stepped out of my car she recognized me and we hugged. My awkwardness began to give way to a feeling of such anger and helplessness. All that was inside that funeral home was a beautiful corpse. What should have been, wasn't. The cycle of addiction and incarceration is so difficult to break once the wheel is turned in that direction.

I went back to the prison this morning after a month's break due to electrical repairs, and I was nervous again. But I was prayed for, as was the group. And as I went in, thoughts of what I saw the night before filled my mind. That is why I am there. Young women should not be dying of overdoses. I want to help prevent any of these girls from becoming a corpse, and that could so easily happen. And the group was powerful-not because of me, but because when love is present, things happen. One young lady just broke down and cried almost the whole time. The need for love, reassurance, help and people to trust in is so very great. It's like pulling two magnets apart to get away from the old life. The fear factor is unbelievable. But after seeing Jessica, I knew I had to be one pair of hands wrapped around those lives to lead them away from death.